My friend Mike got me started on a thing over on Facebook and now I’m bringing it here because I can. For those of you not in the know, I love food and I love science, so I frickin’ love food science. I’m not good at making nutritionally sound choices (yet!), but I love nutrition.
So, I’m going to talk about one of my favorite weird nutrition facts:
White people like cheese so much because we can eat it.
It seems like every time a person of color makes a joke about white people being obsessed with cheese, some white person
misses the point and goes on about how, “Well, obviously, cheese is delicious!” completely proving the point they’ve missed so egregiously.
Well, if you’re black, or Native American, or Asian, or Latinx… yea, cheese maybe isn’t so great. Countries with a high non-white population have higher rates of lactose intolerance. Conversely, countries like the United States, Russia, Australia, Canada, and the majority of Western European countries, which tend to fall predominantly white, all have very low instances of lactose intolerance; 40% or lower. The United States is even broken down further by race, showing that non-white populations within the country have much higher rates of lactose intolerance compared with their white neighbors (I’ve also seen a map which separated the Australian Aborigines from the white population and they too had lactose intolerance rates in the 90% and higher range).
Even Mexcio, which has a cuisine most people consider to be incomplete without gooey cheese on top, has lactose intolerance rates in the 40-60%. GTFO with your cheesy fake Mexican food.
White people eat cheese because it doesn’t make us sick to do so. Of course, other races think we’re bizarre as hell when we slather everything with cheddar. It literally makes them physically ill.
The global population boasts a 75% lactose intolerance rate. The rate is so high that the terminology has changed; lactose intolerance isn’t a thing anymore, but lactose persistence is. So, when a non-white person jokes about how crazy white people are for putting cheese on everything, they are absolutely right.
We are goddamn cheese-eating freaks. Before you comment about how awesome cheese is, remember: we’re the weird ones, here.